draft from “Effexor”

[the primary narrator and protagonist Dylan Starr reflects on how Effexor has significantly reduced his depression and anxiety symptoms]

Cities with skyscrapers built of lava hardened doom

From and upon constantly erupting volcanoes—their fumes

And the acid rain monsoons

Now seem transformed into peaceful beach sand dunes

Ah, sand grains flying in the wind

Begin to rescind

Knots in my lower back and shoulders

Hyperbolic but they felt like boulders

Again— turned into sand or perhaps snow

Or streaming water or a flying misty rainbow

… to feel massaged by the Universe/ nature/ God—I don’t know

Maybe just a Buddhist Nirvana

 Or Schopenhauerian Hindu Upanishad’s Maya

 Semblance of harmony and evidence of life’s best aspects

evidence of some parrots, tortoises, and humans living into their hundreds.

Medicine can subdue and sometimes completely repair injuries, and cure illnesses.

I received a Bachelor’s degree and I’m working on a Masters

My love and I kept a grip on eachother’s hands through many natural disasters…

And though life seems to accelerate faster and faster

It’s  a sense of self and social improvement that I’m after

Not wasting time focused on time itself/as such

There’s so much

Else to pay attention to—look at that!

The Democrats,

They won back

the House of Representatives

 in the 2018 Midterm Elections

and put a check on Trump’s power—

sort of, at least for now

as for how sad I nonetheless feel today

as my great-great-grandfather has passed away,

 in my imagination, he’s with my great-great grandmother, to stay…

My thoughts, they seem/feel less jumbled and chaotic

Quixotic and neurotic,

More focused on my desires

Attracting me, Pulling me forward like Maya’s smiles

And her aura

It’s as if she were the Goddess Flora…

I never cease to gawk

And as we leisurely walk,

Through Autumn’s kaleidoscope of flying leaves

 and its non-abrasive, moderate air, stirring my daydreams:

a craving for boiled potato when it still steams

 as its sits on spinach

that was just removed from the fridge

now a combination in my mouth

driving a 2019 Mercedes Benz driving down

 Interstate 87 South

 through the stunning Ramapo Mountains

gliding like light, like sound…

like the Earth itself as it rotates and revolves round and round

and I feel so lucky to be one of its parts

and I’m contemplating my Liberal Arts education

right now I feel like every day’s a holiday and vacation

but a thought and the accompanying feelings—all just a station

thank the mysterious creativity of the universe for my imagination

inspired by all the jewelry I collect and sell

and the beautiful museum and its hotel

next door

keeps me from getting bored

and even when I feel bothered indeed by misfortunes

 and injustices

tempting me at times to say “fuck this”

I gaze at the fireworks and jewelry of life’s miracles

And feel so fucking spiritual

And Maya, my family and friends

They say they can detect

The anti-depressant and anti anxiety effects

Of my Effexor

Easing the texture of my nerves

I pray that as life goes this precious Effexor still works…

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